Socially Distant, But Closer Than Ever

Social distancing seems to be a new phrase that’s entered our vocabulary since the onset of the 2020 Coronavirus pandemic. We’re told to keep 2 metres between ourselves and anyone outside our households where possible. As I write this in early July, people in the UK are finally able to visit friends at home, but we’re still urged to keep our distance.

I grew up in a family where kisses and cuddles were commonplace. We hugged when we met, when we parted, and probably several times in between. I know people for whom being touched by family members inflicted terror because they were exposed to violence or sexual abuse, but for me, an arm around my shoulders or a tap on the head were signs that I was loved. I was disciplined, but in a controlled and sensible way, and it left me contrite rather than scared.

When the pandemic first started, I remember feeling incredibly grateful for the companionship of my husband, and my heart went out to those having to isolate alone. Yet, as weeks turned into months, even having him here with me didn’t feel like enough. I admit I’ve struggled. Not being able to see friends and share a hug has led to days when I’ve felt very low. Add to that the complication of being blind, and therefore less able to maintain the 2 metres distance required between me and a companion, even after the government said we could meet outdoors.

Now we are on the verge of seeing our churches reopen and being able to meet once again with our Christian families. Yet still, this distancing has to be in place. It seems to have become the new norm. We understand it’s for our protection, yet the thought of entering church and not being greeted with a hug or a handshake seems odd. None of us knows how long this will continue. However, since it would break our hearts if we thought there was even the remotest chance we could pass on a deadly infection to a loved one through a touch or handshake, we will adhere to the rules as far as possible.

Despite the distancing measures, we can still offer love and support, even though we must learn to show it in new ways. I have been so grateful for long telephone chats with friends, during which we’ve laughed and shared almost as intimately as we would face to face. It’s obviously not the same, but it’s come a pretty close second. Online church has also been a blessing, and the wonders of modern technology means some congregations can even see each other as they fellowship.

The question for me has been whether I use this time of distancing negatively or positively. On the days when I’ve struggled, I’ll admit the negative has taken over. I’ve been thinking more about what I don’t have, and less about what I do. I’m sure on those days the enemy of my soul was rubbing his hands together in glee, and Jesus was probably aching to whisper loving truths into my soul, if I would stop whining and start listening.

On the days I have listened, I’ve heard his Holy Spirit reminding me that he will never enforce social distancing upon me. No pandemic can keep us apart, and he wants to draw as close to me as I will let him be. It’s me who pulls away, not Jesus.

Several years ago, a dear friend lost her husband after a battle with cancer. Her grief was understandably profound, and she told of how she would go for long walks in the forest and just cry. The thing she ached for most was a hug. Then one day, the Lord literally put his arms around her, and she felt it tangibly. She had never felt anything like it before, and she hasn’t since, but that hug from Jesus was enough. He was reminding her that although her husband’s arms could no longer encircle her, his holy arms would never let go. She would always be in the very centre of his love. She spoke of how much comfort that unusual manifestation from the Lord gave her. When I asked if she’d ever felt she needed it again, she said no. It came at the right time and was a massive contribution to her healing. She didn’t stop missing her husband, but Jesus felt closer than ever before, and she knew she could go on.

Another friend has shared the growth of her intimacy with Jesus throughout this lockdown period. She said that when life was full of daily commitments, she would bounce out of bed, instantly planning the day that lay before her. She tended to rush through her quiet time because there were just so many things that had to be done. However, with less to do and no where to go, she’s been cherishing her mornings with Jesus more than ever, taking time to dialogue with him while enjoying the morning birdsong in her garden, and testifying to how she has grown in intimacy.

The book of James chapter 4 verse 8 says: “Come near to God, and he will come near to you.” That’s an amazing promise. All he wants is for us to take a few tentative steps toward him, and he’ll come running to meet us. My own experiences confirm that to be true. On the mornings when I, like my friend, sit quietly in my garden and seek intimacy with my Saviour above all else. His companionship dispels loneliness. However, on the days when I wake feeling sorry for myself, missing the human company I can no longer enjoy, and fostering negative thoughts about how long this may go on and what lies ahead, loneliness and despair can overwhelm me.

So why don’t I draw near to God each and every day? Why are there times when even Jesus feels socially distant? The Bible says he is the same yesterday today and forever, so I know the problem is with me. I believe the rest of our verse from James 4 gives an answer. “Wash your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded.”

We’re being urged to wash our hands regularly because of the virus, but the kind of washing mentioned here is a washing of our consciences by repenting of sin. WE all sin each and every day. It’s impossible to go through life without its stain. The trouble comes when we let that sin separate us from god. As Christians, the way of repentance is always open to us. We repented on the day we entered into a relationship with Jesus, but a daily cleansing is still necessary, as Jesus explained to Peter in the famous foot washing passage in John 13. “Those who have had a bath need only to wash their feet; their whole body is clean.” Although we are in a right relationship with God through Jesus’ blood shed on the cross, we still need to repent of those daily sins we get entangled in, because as they add up, they will slowly draw us away from true intimacy with him.

Once we have dealt with repenting of any sin in our lives, remembering to ask Jesus to reveal anything he wishes to point out to us, we can then consider the final part of the verse from James. “Purify your hearts you double-minded.” We are double-minded when the cares and worries of this life infringe upon our quiet times. On the days I get up fixated upon all the Coronavirus has temporarily stolen from me, my mind is torn away from the good things of God. Part of me wants to praise him, but another part is stuck on the things of the world. My praise is drowned out by cares and worries, and although Jesus wants desperately to come close, part of me is inadvertently pushing him away.

Social distancing should never be an issue between Jesus and one of his children. In fact, the tougher life becomes, the closer we should aim to be. Like my friend, I want to rise in the mornings with a desire to spend quality time with Jesus, to hear what he has to say about the day ahead, and how he wants to allay all my fears by replacing them with his truths. But it’s really up to me whether I take him up on that offer, or whether I allow sin or double mindedness to draw me away. If good is going to come out of this pandemic, I believe it will be that the people of God find deeper intimacy during a time of social isolation. We may not have people around us, but we have the most loyal and loving friend of all. “The eternal God is your refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms.” (Deuteronomy 33: 27.) “Let the beloved of the Lord rest secure in him, for he shields him all day long. And the one the Lord loves rests between his shoulders.” (Deuteronomy 33: 12.)