During my childhood, I would often grumble at my parents over the things they wouldn’t allow me to do, especially if my friends’ parents didn’t have the same scruples. I chafed at what was a seeming injustice, not understanding their desire to protect and nurture me in the hope I’d grow into a responsible adult. A friend could watch a certain television show, so why couldn’t I? My mother’s answer would often simply be: “Well, I’m not her mother, so I don’t make the rules in her house.” I understand the wisdom of her choices now far more than I did back then, and I am grateful for the boundaries she set.
In our humanity, we are often prone to look at others, and compare their lives and choices with our own. Maybe you have a friend who is wealthy, while you yourself are struggling to make ends meet. Perhaps you feel this is unfair, and you question the justice of God.
Another scenario is that you wish you had the relationship with Jesus someone else seems to have. They receive words and prophecies, teach or preach. Why can’t this be you? The truth is that we all have our own individual walks with God, and we all receive different gifts. If you feel you don’t have any, I can assure you that’s not true. It may be that you are focusing so much on the desire for someone else’s gift that you’re unable to receive and appreciate your own.
Jesus is a personal Saviour. He died for each and every one of us individually. Just as a parent with several children learns different ways of relating to and communicating with each child, our Father does even more so with us. I believe the Lord wants us to take our eyes off others – what they are or aren’t doing – what they have or don’t have and keep them fixed solely on him.
The apostle Simon Peter learnt this lesson from Jesus in John 21. These events occurred after the crucifixion, and more crucially for Peter, after he had denied all knowledge of Jesus. Jesus had warned him the denial was coming, but Peter wouldn’t believe it until fear motivated him to do what he’d sworn he’d never do. Afterward, when he remembered Jesus words, he wept bitterly. I’m sure he was consumed with guilt, and maybe wondered what would happen next. It might’ve taken a while for him to remember Jesus words of reassurance: But I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail. “And when you have turned back, strengthen your brothers.” (Luke 22: 32.) Jesus was reassuring peter his failure wouldn’t be final but simply a steppingstone to help him grow in his journey of faith.
Now, in John 21, we find Peter and his fellow apostles wondering what to do next. Jesus has died and been miraculously resurrected, but what does that mean for them? Jesus appears to them here on the seashore, after they have been fishing all night and caught nothing. He ensures they have a catch, then cooks them breakfast. Once again, he is serving and caring for his friends. After the meal is done, he reinstates Peter by asking him 3 times whether he loves him. Peter’s answer is yes. Just as he denied 3 times, now he has 3 chances to declare his love for Jesus.
The relief for Peter must have been immense, yet we still find the flesh at work, when he is concerned by a possible injustice. The Lord predicts the kind of death by which Peter would one day glorify him (John 21: 18-19.) Then he begins to move away from the disciples and asks Peter to follow. Peter is slightly frustrated when he sees John, a fellow disciple, has joined them. Peter’s response, in verse 21, is to say: “Lord, what about him?” In other words: “If I’m going to have to suffer for you, why shouldn’t he?”
As we read the Bible, we sense a little competition between Peter and John on a couple of occasions, most notably when they run to the empty tomb, and John has to make a note of the fact that he outran Peter. (John 20: 4.) Yet, he acknowledges that although he looked into the tomb and saw the empty graveclothes, it was Peter who had the courage to step inside. John 20: 6.)
As we read the gospels, we get the feeling that Peter and John were very different characters. I’ve heard Peter described as a “Ready, fire aim!” kind of guy. In other words, he would both speak and act without always taking the time to consider the consequences. John seems to have been more thoughtful. Yet, he must have had a quick temper, for Jesus christened him and his brother James the “Sons of thunder.” (Mark 3: 17.) Luke 9 records an occasion when James and John wanted to call down fire upon some Samaritans who refused to welcome Jesus. (Luke 9: 52-55.) Clearly, John had a zeal for his Saviour that could sometimes be carried a bit far.
Going back to John 21, when Peter questions Jesus about the fact he’s predicted his death but said nothing about John’s, Jesus replies: “If I want him to remain alive until I return, what is that to you? You must follow me.” (John 21: 22.) Some have misunderstood this comment and taken it to mean that Jesus loved John more than Peter, especially as in his own gospel, John refers to himself so often as “the disciple whom Jesus loved.” However, this is not the case.
Don’t forget, it was Peter whom God chose to be his mouthpiece at the birth of the church in Acts chapter 2. Peter went on to heal, raise the dead, and to be the first church leader. The man who’d betrayed Jesus had a huge part to play in the early church. The Lord took his eagerness to speak before thinking, tempered it, and used it for his glory. John also had a part to play, but his was different from Peter’s. He received the revelation of the end times that makes up the last book of the Bible.
If Peter and John had spent the rest of their lives focusing on one another and what they were or weren’t doing, they might have missed out on what God had for them. The Lord’s wisdom had a plan carved for them both, just as he does for you and me. My parents respected and loved the families of my friends and weren’t necessarily criticising their upbringing of their children when they set different rules for me; they simply knew their own child. My mother knew that allowing me to watch certain programs would result in me having fears and nightmares, because I was a very skittish person.
So, let’s just concentrate on what God is doing in our own lives. It is good to pray for others, encourage them where we can, and where necessary, offer corrective advice if they are behaving in a way that is clearly out of line with scripture, but let’s not compare ourselves with them, or feel we are hard done by because we don’t have the gifts or callings they seem to have. Jesus has a special path marked out for you and me, and only we can walk it. Yet, we will only do so successfully if we keep our eyes fixed upon him. Let’s stop looking around, and gaze upwards into his glorious face. When we do, the things of earth and all the comparisons we might be tempted to make will grow strangely dim, in the light of his glory and grace.